Grumpy Old Music Man

Why do concerts have to start so early?

Chris Thomas and I attended a concert on behalf of Seen and Heard last Tuesday night.
Dukas: La Péri 19'
Ravel: Piano Concerto for the Left Hand 20'
Haddad: "Alternative World-versions" for Piano & Orchestra (UK premiere) 11'
Debussy: La Mer 25'
CBSO Ilan Volkov conductor
Saleem Abboud Ashkar piano

Chris leaves work in Leamington Spa at 5.30 and drives to me to change and have a quick meal before we set of to Birmingham. The concerts start at 7.30pm. We usually get there with about 10 minutes to spare although it has been difficult in recent months with road works on both the A45 and on the alternative M6 route. This week the roads were clear but we found Birmingham gridlocked. When we reached our usual car park we followed a slow procession all the way to the top of the multi-storey only to wind all the way down again as the carpark was full. We had never met this before. We pleaded with the man on the CBSO barrier to let us in as we were reviewing the concert but it was more than his 'jobsworth'. Eventually we sat in another car park until someone pulled out of a space.
We entered Symphony Hall about 15minutes late.

The cheery doorkeeper announced that we too had been caught out by Coldplay at the National Indoor Arena. He could not put us in the radio rooms as they were already full of late-comers. So we missed La Péri - and how often can one hear that in concert?

The Warwick Arts Centre starts its concerts at 8.00 and the Birmingham International concerts also used to start at 8.00. This took all the stress out of a concert. Now the BIC also start at 7.30!

Why are concerts so short?
If you add up the figures the above concert was just over 75 minutes in length. In a credit-crunch economy how many will pay over £25 for such a short concert. If the concert is this short why the need to start it so early?

Why no overtures?
Travel is stressful and you need time in a concert hall to settle down before you can pay real attention to the music. This requires something short and familiar. Rossini's Silken Ladder would do nicely. But we have not been given overtures in Birmingham for years.

Why does the bar close almost immediately after the concert?
Whilst I am not craving alcohol it would be nice to be able to relax after the concert over a coffee and discuss what we have been listening to whilst the concert traffic disperses. This is just about possible at Birmingham as the bar does remain open fleetingly after the concert but then shuts up around you as you drink your coffee. The ambience is all wrong.

You will be able to read what Chris though of this concert with an unusual soloist and work next Tuesday of Seen and Heard.
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Before you go something completely different which amused me: It came from a book about the use of Grammar.

Suffering from impotence, a man visits several doctors asking for help, all to no avail. Finally, out of desperation, he visits a witchdoctor. The witch doctor gives him a potion that can only be used once a year and tells him to take it before he is ready to be intimate. Then, when the time is right he should say 'one, two, three' and his impotence will be cured for as long as he likes.

The man asks 'How do I make that potion stop working?'
'Oh, that's easy,' the doctor replies, 'You just say, "one, two, three, four."'

That evening before he enters the house, the man drinks the potion. He surprises his wife by immediately leading her to the bedroom. Things are going well and the man whispers, 'one, two, three'.
His wife gives him a funny look and asks, 'What'd you say "one, two, three" for?

And that is why you should never end a sentence with a preposition

Len